On this week's episode of A Healthy Push podcast, I welcome back Annie, a former Panic to Peace student turned friend and someone you often hear on my podcast! Annie and I have grown close over the past couple of years, and I was so excited to catch up with her and hear about everything that’s going on in her life. And additionally, how she’s been managing everything; including her relationship with anxiety, panic, and agoraphobia. If you want a little backstory to Annie’s journey with anxiety, you can head here.
Annie’s Big Move
For the past few years, Annie and her husband have lived in beautiful, sunny Southern California. However, the past year saw them committing to a move to a not-so-nearby location, Illinois. New jobs, a new State, and a new home… halfway across the country. Annie has come a long way in her relationship with anxiety, but a major life change such as this is certainly something that would challenge and test her progress. Now officially settled in Illinois, I was curious to know how it went, how Annie dealt with it pre and post-move, and how she’s doing now!
Leading up to the move…
As Annie explains, she and her husband first settled on the plan to move to Illinois in March of last year, executing the move about 9 months later, in December. It wasn’t initially a negative notion, as they are both from and enjoy the mid-west, so when the plan was first put into motion, Annie explains how she was almost dismissive of the anxious feelings this major move may bring on. It was months away from becoming a reality, so the magnitude hadn’t fully set in. It was when Annie and her husband started looking at and eventually purchasing a house in their soon-to-be new home, Illinois, that the anxious feelings started making themselves more pronounced. She attempted to acknowledge the feelings without letting them overwhelm her, with the help of her therapist.
Anticipatory Anxiety and Creating Exposure Steps
Anticipatory anxiety can present itself situationally (something like a big move or an upcoming doctor’s appointment). Alternatively, it can occur as a more broad uncertainty about the future in general. In this case, Annie was getting a healthy dose of both forms. As previously mentioned, Annie has come a long way in her relationship with anxiety. But, as she has previously struggled with panic attacks, agoraphobia, and driving anxiety, it was hard to ignore that moving her life across the country (albeit driving there) may present some challenges. So, Annie and her therapist put a plan together leading up to the move, consisting of weekly benchmarks and exercises, centering around exposure therapy.
Some of these weekly exposure exercises included:
Dropping her husband off at work every day by herself
Going to the grocery store and running other errands, alone
Getting on the highway, start by driving 1 exit and gradually increase the distance week-to-week
Talking through and acknowledging her anxious feelings with her therapist, in person and on the phone
For people like Annie who struggle with driving anxiety, agoraphobia, and panic, these tasks set out by her therapist were challenging, but she was determined to complete them. Towards the start of the benchmark exercises, Annie remembers being in the car, crying on the phone with her therapist, convinced that she ‘couldn’t do this’. The anticipatory anxiety about the move increased, and Annie was doubtful of her ability to manage all of it. If she was struggling to simply drive 20 minutes away, or one exit on the highway, how was she supposed to drive halfway across the country? However, as the weeks went on and the exposure therapy exercises increased, Annie gradually started gaining her confidence back. Crediting the lessons and applications she learned during her time in the Panic to Peace program, coupled with the support and motivation she was receiving from her therapist, her mindset started shifting. Instead of entertaining all of these “what-if” thoughts about the move, and worrying about what may go wrong, she was coming to the realization that these thoughts were largely unwarranted and irrational; she could do this!
And I was so delighted to hear that a week prior to her big move, her therapist shared with her that she no longer met the diagnostic criteria for panic disorder and agoraphobia. How cool is this?!
So, How Did the Move Go!?
Well, now that Annie is officially settled into her new life in Illinois, I was eager to know: how did the move go? As she admits, Annie was still having moments of panic and fear leading up to moving day. In those moments, she leaned on her therapist, someone she trusted and was comfortable with, to help her see what Annie could not: she could do this, and she’s come a long way with her anxiety, panic, and agoraphobia. Is it still there in some sense, in certain moments? Sure. But these things are in no way consuming and controlling her life anymore. Annie put in the work, over months and years, and has made major strides.
Packed into a rented car with all of their belongings (and 6 animals), Annie and her husband set out on the 3-day, nearly 25-hour drive to Illinois. And while she was apprehensive to start the trip, Annie was happy to report that she experienced exactly zero panic attacks, the entire trip. She explains that the more they drove, as the hours went on and she got further from their familiar surroundings in California, the anxious thoughts and feelings became less and less prevalent. For someone who has struggled with driving anxiety, panic, and agoraphobia, this was a huge moment for Annie, and hopefully can serve as inspiration for anybody struggling with similar issues!
I can’t thank Annie enough for joining me and sharing these experiences. For now, join me in wishing her the best in her new life in Illinois! But I’m sure we’ll hear her again soon on the podcast to do another Q&A episode with me where we answer your questions.
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